Beads, braids, blouses and bordered saree (a garment consisting of a length of cotton or silk elaborately draped around the body, traditionally worn by women from South Asia.), were the fantasies of my childhood once. I dreamed of being like my mother. I used to pray God that He would provide me the life and beauty like my mother; whenever I would get a chance, I would play with my 'Doll House' and be a housewife pretending to be like my mother.
Today, I turned 16, the age when a young girl blossoms and here I am a mother just like my mother. She is in her peak of beauty. She dreams of her Mr. Right. But I here, in the most colorful days of my life, am in the darkness playing with my one year old daughter. I am a mother and I am proud of my motherhood, but at this moment, what I desire is that my daughter may never have the same dreams like that of mine.
I had this dream as my society grew me up with the same dream. I had seen my mother and my sisters and taken them as role models. I never thought that there is a life beyond this and there is a space ; my own identity as a woman in this world. Nobody made me realize the importance of education in my life. No body told me that I can fly; fly like a bird in my own world with my own ambition.
I was made a bride in a very young age. They draped me in a red dazzling saree, made my hair and gave me golden ear rings and I thought I really was the doll like that of my Doll House. I thought I was playing my own game where I am really like my mother. But I never knew that what happened that day wasn't a game. With each homage alongside fire, with the partner on my side, I was being burnt. My dreams were being burnt. I cannot find words to express my pain when I was begetting my daughter. I thought I was going to die. At that moment I questioned God, "God, why you chose me to bear this pain?"
A sister from the next village working to raise awareness about female education, told me that not only me but every year 15 million girls are married as children world wide denying their rights to health, education and opportunity and robbed of their childhood. In the developing world, one in nine girls are married before her 15th birthday and some child brides are as young as eight or nine like me when I was neither physically nor emotionally ready to become a wife or a mother. She also told me about the law there for abolishing child marriage but I think the people of our village are not aware ofit. Otherwise, why would they go against it?
I was wedded in my early age. I had to leave my dreams. I had to be away from my rights. Now I don't want other girls to be the victim of the same culture. I even don't want to trap my daughter in the same problem. I was innocent; I had to suffer. Will you, the respected people and all the society members please make a society safe for the young girls? Will you please allow us to read? Will you please show us the new dream of flying higher rather than being a bride? I urge you to listen to my prayers and help the young girls lead the life of their choice. I don't want my daughter's fate to be the same as mine.
Written by:
Bhawana Shrestha
Nepal
bhawana2013@teachfornepal.org
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