Was she raped?

It was Sunday. The day before, I had a good rest. So I was in a good mood. I had a great energy and I hoped to maintain my energy level and pass the week in the same wave till the end. I became ready to head towards my workplace. I think God had really thought to be supportive to me this weekend. I didn't have to wait too long for the bus. It arrived as soon as I reached the stop. This escalated my energy level. I boarded the bus. I saw a seat was calling me to go and sit there. I happily accepted its invitation and sat there. Though, it was early morning, the driver wanted to listen to something peppy bollywood item numbers. Umm! I don't prefer listening to those kinds early in the morning but I decided not to ruin my jolly mood with it and started to roll with the beat.

Next stop, just after some 10 minutes, a middle woman boarded the bus with her cute little daughter of may be four or five. Since, the couple sitting in front of mine seat had got off the bus; the woman chose to sit there. The bus resumed. Interestingly, the little girl stood up from her seat and looked at me. She didn't say a word but rather kept smiling. I smiled her back at her. Of course, every one would do that. After all no one can keep on remain sturdy when a child is smiling to you. You automatically become a child yourself. I too did the same. Surprising me more, she started to play peek-a-boo with me. I already mentioned how cute she was and her playful act added some sweetness in her. I was engrossed in her act. I didn't know how that one hour journey flew away without any boredom. Just before my stop, the woman got off the bus. Though the girl left me, she left me with a wide smile on my face for the next 10 minutes. When I got off, I thought my day was actually going to be great.

My day passed well with the signal that as my wish my week was going to be well. I finished my work and was ready to return my room. But this time the luck was against me. None of the seats were vacant. I had to wait for a bus for a long time just to see that none of the bus were welcoming. Every bus that  came was fully packed even without a place to stand. As the dusk was growing older, I thought to catch any bus that would come even if it was packed. Finally I happened to find a micro bus. Luckily I got a small space to place my bottom as well. I thought to thank God even for that and prayed that He would be kind enough to make my journey a little bit more comfortable by making someone get off from the micro bus so that I would get some more space to sit. But he had something terrible in his wallet for me.

Suddenly I felt someone moving hands below my bosom. It made me really uncomfortable. I looked beside me and found a middle aged man sleeping. He seemed as if he was in a deep sleep and doesn't know that his hands had already left their normal place. I tried to wake him up and warn him that his hands may have slipped form its place where it should be. But my nose found out that his hands are not going to obey him as his whole body was in control of alcohol. So, I myself shifted away from his hands. But again, his hands followed me and now dared to touch little bit above from my bra line. I screamed and everyone's attention drifted towards me except that man who still was closing his eyes as if he was in a deep sleep. His friends too were there but instead of apologizing or making awakening him, they mentioned that he didn't any bad intentions but that was all because he was asleep.

Whatever his intentions were, that left me in a shock. It was really really a bad experience for me. I came home sad with no appetite. If it had been other days, I would have jumped on to eat anything that I would get, but that day it was something different. I thought to change my mood and switched on my TV just to watch the news where a five years old girl had been raped by a middle aged man and dumped to die in the street. No, the news didn't reveal the actual name of the victim. But whoever she was, she had a very tragic end. But when the anchor told the place where she was found dead after raped, I was shattered into pieces. It was the same place where the child I met in the bus early in the morning had got off with her mother.

Even after two months of this incident, I haven't been able to sleep properly. Every morning I search her in the bus if she would board the bus, but my hope goes despair and I scold myself every time for being so cruel as I ask at the end of each day. Was she raped?

From : Bhawana Shrestha

Nepal